Branches Book

BRANCHES

Elena Rey

THE F WORD

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When I was about six years old I got into a fight with my then ten-year- old sister. A combination of my limited vocabulary, my extreme lack of judgment, and intention to win the argument at all costs caused me to spew out the meanest phrase I could muster: “Well, you’re fat!” Even at such a young age, I knew that the most hurtful thing I could call my sister was “fat.” Children of six generally know very little about the world around them, and yet, at that age, I knew that fat is the worst thing a person could be. Fat is seen as a bad word used to hurt, degrade, and dehumanize. Most modern Americans avoid using the word at all costs, as if saying that one syllable will unleash a storm of ugly sure to infect them and the ones they love. I can call myself curvy, big-boned, or chubby, without so much as the bat of an eye, but never fat because that would imply a disgusting unattractiveness so beyond desirable. In fact, I don’t know anyone who has a positive reaction to the word fat. But, let’s take a closer look at the word itself. Fat is obviously an adjective, a descriptor, but it’s also a noun. It’s quite literally the substance on our bodies, without which we would die. And though certainly the significance of the word in adjective form cannot be denied, what if there weren’t any significance? What if the word were neutral? What if the word “fat” became neutralized in the way that tall, short, tan, and pale are? I don’t mean to deny that each of those words has connotations of their own, but none have quite the emotional weight that fat does. There is an absolute gut- wrenching fear that comes with the prospect of being called fat, or worse: being fat. This “fat fear” is all too familiar to myself and so many other women and teenage girls. Body insecurity and fat fear is something that we all experience no matter what we look like. It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize this, but skinny people also feel insecure and often have the same fears as fat people. After speaking with quite a few young women, many of whom are my classmates, I discovered that we all deal with the same struggle to overcome

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