Branches Book

BRANCHES

Mila Stromboni

WAS IT WORTH IT?

Love is one of the most powerful and wonderful emotions humans can experience. But love can also lead to pain. Sometimes you love someone so much and you are willing to give them so much that you end up losing yourself. But what do I know of love. I’ve been in love once. Or at least I thought I was. I don’t know any more if the love I felt for him was real, or if I fell in love with the idea of love. From the outside, we seemed to be a happy couple in a happy world. We were both healthy before the accidents started happening. I had never given a limb of mine to someone else before. I had only heard about it in the news and from friends. This guy from Sweden gave his daughter who had been in a car accident a part of his back. It doesn’t happen often, but sometimes it does. People love each other so much they literally give a part of themselves to save the ones they care about. It’s only happened a few times because it’s hard for your body to function after transplanting a limb. No one has ever given as much as I did. People at the clinic were shocked that I was still alive. Before the accidents, I worked in an art gallery in downtown Los Angeles where I assisted artists with their exhibitions. 2183 was a booming year for artists. Everyone seemed so inspired to produce fascinating art. I spent my days working with these incredible people before going home and spending hours painting. Each day, I could feel myself becoming closer to the person I wanted to be: a confident, creative painter. For me, making art was a tangible way of expressing myself and growing as a person. Even though I was working very hard to better myself, still I felt like something was missing. I felt in need of some human connection I couldn’t get from my friends and family. Truthfully, it was hard for me to love myself. I always felt like I wasn’t good enough or deserving enough, and I needed others’ validation to make me feel worthy. I knew it was wrong, but I wanted people’s love instead of my own. I had so much love to give to someone that I felt I wasn’t good enough to give to myself. Then one day, that all changed. I was invited to a birthday picnic on the beach by one of my co-workers. She had always been friendly to me, so I reluctantly went. I wasn’t a huge fan of parties; especially work parties. It’s the perfect time for my co-workers to ask invasive questions like, “So, tell us about your love life?” “Why aren’t you dating anyone? You’re such a pretty girl”, “Do you want to work in your small gallery forever?” “Are you always this shy?”…So annoying. When I

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